Breaking the Mold: Challenging Emotional Norms in Worship
What Emotions are Excluded In Christian Worship
There appears to be an underlying assumption among respondents regarding what emotional expressions should universally look like, consequently shaping the church's worship practices to align with this perceived emotional standard. Nonetheless, I propose that the interplay between human emotion and cultural expression is more fluid. Specifically, worship practices should influence our emotional expressions as much as we adapt worship to reflect our existing emotional expressions (understood here as those influenced by another culture, rather than as universal constants).
Previously, I mentioned that when I requested survey respondents to answer questions related to emotion, I intentionally did not define the term. This approach was designed to elicit responses that could provide insights into how individuals within the church perceive emotion, without influencing their answers. What has emerged is an expansion of emotion into the categories of mood, vibe, and creedal practice (confession, repentance, contrition). By avoiding leading them, participants were able to respond freely. Although I am still developing a foundational definition of emotion based on these responses, it is evident that certain preconceived notions are influencing their answers.
One notion that comes up repeatedly in the research is that spiritually supersedes emotions, as evidenced by quotes like the following from a Reformed Worship leader, “Again, the focus shouldn't be on emotion, but on the Lord. When the focus in on Jesus, people can experience all the different emotions they need to as they relate to Him. He can bring true conviction of sin, which results in repentance, grief over sin and confession in one person, while another person is basking in His love and receiving healing from emotional traumas all at the same time in the same service.” The same leader believes that emotions get in the way of the spiritual and that focusing on emotional formation gets in the way of spiritual formation. Such an answer and way of thinking over-emphasizes the role of Christ’s love and mercy while downplaying the role of emotions. The congregant who is dealing with trauma may feel the warmth of Christ’s love while also needing to find a language to express their feelings around the trauma.
Nicholas Wolterstorff, a philosopher and theologian, posits that lament is not merely about suffering. According to Wolterstorff, lament does not concern itself with cataloging stages of suffering or identifying one's current stage. Rather, he suggests that lament involves giving voice to the suffering that accompanies profound loss, whatever form that loss may take. Lament transcends the mere shedding of tears associated with mourning and sadness by verbalizing the suffering one experiences.
The Psalms, which express various feelings of sadness, serve not only to articulate these emotions but also to instruct their readers and singers on how to address their emotions to God in a faithful manner. The Psalmist is not reprimanded for expressing sorrow, nor should the Church rebuke those who share their sadness with the Lord. This principle extends to the Psalms of Joy, Thanksgiving, Praise, Anger, and Longing, as they provide templates for expressing these emotions through song, either by using the exact words from Scripture or by adapting them to meet personal needs.
By examining the perceived dichotomy between spiritual and emotional expressions through this lens, it becomes evident that there is a degree of hypocrisy in readily singing about our "happy" emotions to the Lord while denying the appropriateness of voicing our sadness. It is my contention then, that churches have preconceived notions about what worship is, based on their theological traditions interpreting of the Bible that they then idealize and elevate to the standard that all churches should be held to. To illustrate that, I asked the worship leaders what the leaders thought was emotionally absent from their worship services and will dive into their answers below.
Essentially, there is a tendency to believe that worship should conform to a particular norm, rather than reflecting our current emotional state. The traditions represented in the data exclude these emotions and due to that, the local assemblies tend to exclude them, even if they think that they should belong. That is shown by the alignment of answers from a denominational point of view.
The denominations seem to align themselves with their answers and highlight some of the areas that seem to be missing, which also shows how the leaders think differently than their tradition thinks. For example, 4 Reformed (about half of the Reformed respondents) think that grief is missing from their services, which means that the Reformed worship tradition focuses more on joy and praise than grief. It is interesting that there is disparity between what the tradition focuses on and what the leaders want it to focus on.
Beyond denomination, I wanted to see if there was a cultural shift happening, and I had the data broken down by age range. It appears that there is not a great divide between the generations. That shows that there is a longing for these emotions to be included, but they end up being excluded.
Is there a mood, feeling, or emotion that you think is excluded or not included enough in your services? Why or why not?
I asked the worship leaders to name a feeling that is excluded or not included in their own worship services to understand how they perceive their worship mood, and to see what they name as missing from their services. It is interesting what they named, because the top two emotions missing are often talked about as opposites. The two which were mentioned the most were Sadness paired with Lament and Joy paired with Praise. Understandably, Anger was said to be under-represented in worship but what really interested me was that several churches said that no emotions were excluded.
In breaking down the data, the reasons for the first three emotions seemed to agree with each other, while those that answered that no emotions are missing in their services were split into two camps.
Sadness and Lament
An older Reformed worship leader writes that “There's an underlying desire to show "happy face first" in all of us.” Christian Contemporary Music artists Casting Crowns asks in the song, Stained Glass Masquerade,
Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
The smiles to hide our pain?
For some individuals, their experience in the Church involves feeling compelled to conceal their pain and present a cheerful demeanor upon entering the sanctuary. The worship leader insightfully addresses this issue by explaining that "Sadness and lament are spaces that we don't start with. And that's a hard reality when we're all coming into worship in a different space and starting with praise." The leader highlights that, like many churches, their services commence with Praise and Joy, making it challenging to transition to a mood of sadness and lament once a joyful atmosphere has been established.
A different Reformed Worship Leader writes that “Often people come to church looking to feel good and are made very uncomfortable by sitting in and validating difficult emotions.” They frame that by saying that their congregation is uncomfortable sitting in lament and sadness for too long and from my research, I feel that uncomfortableness comes from not practicing sitting inside of those emotions and allowing a feeling of comfortability with them to be established. Another Reformed Worship Leader writes that lament is “a culturally shunned emotion that is not practiced, so people don't want to feel "down" about themselves.” Because Lament and Sadness are not culturally practiced and actively avoided, it is difficult to have those emotions in their worship services. If the people are used to ignoring their Sadness, it is difficult to practice Sadness and enable Lament in a service without feeling manipulative or like the worship leader is forcing the emotion. Again, the Worship Leaders are taking the emotional temperature of their congregation and trying to operate inside of the perceived wants of the congregation. In a way, the congregation is manipulating the emotion of the service based on their feedback and willingness to engage in emotions that the leaders notice is missing from their services.
Another Reformed Worship Leader offers the thought that the reason their church does not practice is lament is that “People have various views on issues, and we don't want to offend someone’s view. So, we avoid talking about the hard stuff and bringing it to God.” They mention the current political divide that is happening and would see lamenting a political issue as causing a divide in the congregation instead of being a teaching moment for the congregation. It is a very practical motivation, as they do not want to cause in-fighting in their church and understand that lamenting about various ideologies from the stage would not be healthy for their church.
What I Noticed: All the churches that answered Sadness and Lament are trying to address practical problems that occur within leading a ministry. In the surveyed area, there are over 350 different churches, usually with a variety of choices of places to worship within the same denomination. They are trying not to alienate their congregation or see people leave due to a change in the emotional mood of the church they attend.
Joy and Praise
“Our church does not engage in spontaneous, exciting praise. I've been told this is because that isn't their culture or natural background,” writes a Baptist Worship Leader. Sometimes, a church is made of people who do not know how to express their joy or do not feel comfortable being emotionally engaged in their worship to a degree where they will engage in spontaneous praise. The Baptist church which I grew up in had one or two people who would shout an “amen” (usually during the sermon) when they agreed with a point that was being made but would not burst into song or make a joyful noise because that was not the culture of the church. In a response to a different question, the leader writes that one of the favorite moments is when the congregation was swept up in emotion, but that is not part of how they usually engage in the music.
A Reformed Worship Leader writes that, “Maybe we don't do enough actual adoration/praise.” They continue that they “confess and we say thank you.... but maybe not so much straight up praise and glorifying to God.” It is possible that the leader is thinking that the congregation knows how to thank God but does not know how to move pass thankfulness into praising God beyond thinking about what God has done for them.
A Non-Denominational Worship Leader writes, “I think true joy, because we don’t know how to genuinely express it corporately.” They elaborate their answer in a different question, writing that “expressions of happiness can lack genuineness for a community to express, but there is a real joy that comes through the truth of the gospel, that echoes despite difficult circumstances.” Sometimes, praise and joy can feel like they are manipulated, forced, or ingenuine, and it is difficult to overcome these obstacles.
What I Noticed: I did not expect worship leaders to list Joy and Praise as missing from their services. Most of the respondents listed Joy and Praise towards the top of the emotions expressed in their services, however I understand the concerns raised here. Often, Praise and Joy are limited to certain expressions and topics. The congregation might praise God for the work of redemption, while also struggling to praise God for anything else. One of the leaders whom I interviewed stated that even though their denominational hymnal had songs praising God for the work of Creation and revelation of beauty inside of Creation, those hymns were rarely sang, if ever. Another congregation might express joy when told to but has a hard time giving voice to joy on their own due to cultural backgrounds.
Anger
The emotion that did and did not surprise me showing up here is Anger. Most prayer books and hymnals do not include any songs of anger in relation to God or our enemies, and it seems a little against Christianity to sing our anger. A Lutheran Worship Leader writes that, “We talk about the sin of anger, but we rarely use or sing any of the imprecatory psalms that would be a righteous way of dealing with our anger. I think people are uncomfortable with the idea of calling upon God to strike down His enemies, despite it being present in his Word.” With the command to turn the other cheek and to love our enemies, it feels weird to sing against people. There are imprecatory passages scattered across the Scriptures, but when the church focuses on love, mercy, and forgiveness it is hard to explain how anger fits in. It feels like it would go against the message to ask God to take vengeance or to bless those who bash the little ones against the rocks.
What I Noticed: It would require substantial preparatory work with the congregation to elucidate how these Psalms align with the message of Scripture. This could be challenging to explain because anger appears to contradict the core principles we preach. Nevertheless, it is an important human emotion, and we must learn how to communicate with God about it. Anger is usually only employed when talking about sin, and I struggle to offer suggestions about how to use it in worship even though it belongs. But as Trish Harrison Warren makes clear in her book Prayer in the Night, “it is better to come to God with sharp words than to remain distant from him, never voicing our doubts and disappointments. Better to rage at the Creator than to smolder in polite devotion. God did not smite the psalmist. Through the Psalms, he dares us to speak to him bluntly (pg. 48) Coming to God with your anger, at God, the world, the people around you, is more authentically human than trying to hide it. Admitting to God that you are angry about something is to have a deep relationship with God, instead of a polite but surface level sense of how to relate to God. The Church has God’s permission to bring our anger to God, even if that anger is directed at God and the Church.
None of the Above
A Reformed Worship Leader responded, “Not really, I think there are enough songs to choose from that really you can pick songs that have a wide range of emotions” while a Lutheran responds in the same way, saying “no - I think we manage to hit what needs to be conveyed, based on the lectionary cycle.” That thought continues in the response of a Reformed Baptist leader, who says, “Honestly no - I DON'T feel any mood/emotion is excluded. I feel like our church family is offered the tools most every Sunday to express the spectrum of emotions either through song, the call and response of the spoke liturgy, at the Lord's Table, through the preaching, or through a combination of these elements.” Or the Pentecostal Worship Leader who responded, “nope. We typically get into all of them.”
An Episcopal Worship Leader also responds, “Not really. I don’t think we use grief that often, but it does have its place in Holy Week services and in funerals, and that is probably appropriate.” Another Episcopal Worship Leader agrees that “All emotions, all things are included in worship, the scriptures, and in our relationship with God and one another.” These answers seem to trust that the liturgy and traditional worship in their denomination include all the emotions in their worship.
There is an alternative perspective that suggests emotions should be entirely excluded from worship. Proponents of this view argue that emotions can interfere with the spiritual formation occurring within their local congregation, and therefore, have no place in the worship experience. Since emotions are not to be included in emotion, all emotions are excluded and that is a good thing. That view is represented by a Reformed Worship Leader when they write that
I'm not trying to evoke certain emotions. That could border on manipulation. I'm trying to enable/encourage people to enter into thanksgiving, praise and worship - to focus their minds and hearts on the Lord and do business with Him. Emotions are a part of the soul; if their spirits are engaged, their souls (emotions) will be impacted, but you can have an emotional experience that isn't spiritual. That doesn't result in life change, where a spiritual experience will change their lives.
There is a concern that efforts to elicit an emotional response may result in only a fleeting sense of reverence, which could be interpreted as manipulative. Consequently, the individual may revert to their previous state shortly after the worship service concludes, without undergoing a substantive spiritual experience. Additionally, this approach may lead the person to primarily engage with their own emotions rather than fostering a genuine connection with God.
What I Noticed: Eight out of the thirty-three respondents indicated that they do not exclude any emotions from their worship services. They reasoned that the lectionary texts and cycles inevitably encompass all emotions. However, as noted in a previous post, most imprecatory and lament Psalms are typically excluded from church lectionaries. Additionally, these texts are often paired with other texts emphasizing the joy of the Lord, which allows worship leaders and pastors to concentrate on how God alleviates grief, sadness, anger, doubt, and confusion. I wonder if the worship leaders who answered that they cover all the emotions have fully examined their worship orders and made sure that was true. It is very easy as a researcher to see the parts of a service that are missing or are not highlighted in the way that they should be. I do not want to sound like I am questioning the sincerity of their responses.
Concluding Thoughts
Incorporating emotions that are often excluded from worship into a service poses significant challenges. Most worship music primarily facilitates the congregation's expression of joy and praise to God for the faithful works of redemption that have been fulfilled and promised. Introducing songs that cover a wider range of emotions, and ensuring they resonate meaningfully with the participants, is difficult. The role of a worship leader is complex, with various practical and professional obstacles in expressing the full spectrum of human emotions during worship. Typically, leaders have time to lead only four songs per week across 52 weeks. Congregants may resist learning new songs or new languages or modes of worship. On top of that, individuals might leave a church if they believe it focuses on incorrect emotions or doctrines, adding to the complexity of the task.
Additionally, suitable material might be scarce. While numerous artists compose songs reflecting sadness, lament, anger, joy, and praise, identifying those that align well with a specific community can be challenging. Moreover, it takes time for a congregation to become acquainted with new songs, necessitating a temporary halt on other songs during this acclimatization period. Although I am tempted to list songs that I find helpful to express these emotions, I am not sure that they will be helpful to all the churches. Instead, I want to challenge worship leaders to find songs inside of their traditions that express these excluded emotions, whatever they may be in their local context. And I want to challenge congregations to embrace these changes and allow to be lead into new ways of expressing themselves before God.